Saturday, July 12, 2008

An Attempted Insomnia Demon Exorcism

OK, the more I think about this, the angrier I get.

Not eating a cracker that was freely given to me doesn't even qualify as a crime, much less a hate crime.

At the most, it's hate. And even if hate was to become a crime, well, I know a lot of people who should be getting arrested before someone who didn't eat the holy snack food. People who make death threats because someone decided not to engage in ritual cannibalism spring to mind.

There are so many jokes I could make about this whole thing, but they're all coming from a negative emotional space I want to spend as little time in as possible. Hopefully this (very restrained compared to what it was before I edited it) tirade will have served its cathartic purpose and I'll be able to sleep now.

***

Linda pointed out a story about a woman discovering she'd been carrying a bat around in her bra--after it had been there for six hours. Apparently, she felt it but thought it was her cell phone vibrating, which makes me wonder where the hell she keeps her cell phone.

But I can't throw stones. This reminds me of the time I found a giraffe in my underwear. I felt something moving around down there, but thought it was just the kangaroo.

A

No comments: