E-Mail to my Mum

Mum--

So we have this fairly lengthy talk and I hang up and I'm thinking
there's SOMETHING I was supposed to say and then Tiina tells me that
we're going to her parents' on Sunday for lobster tails, and I say,
"Lobster tails? What's the occasion?" and she looks at me like I'm kind
of dumb and says, "Uh, it's Mother's Day...?" with that rising tone at
the end that indicates her question is actually an answer being given
to a person who's kind of stupid and I say, "Oh crap, I should've
wished Mum a happy mother's day while we were talking," and she says
"Yeah, you really should've" and then I say "Your Dad's cooking lobster
tails?" and she says, "Have you ever met my Dad?" and I say "So who's
cooking the lobster tails?" and she says "My mom," and I say "Your
Mum's having us over to her house so she can cook lobster tails for us
on MOther's Day?" and she says, "Yeah," and I say, "You're joking," and
she says, "Have you ever met my Mom?" and I say "Oh. Yeah."

So we're going over to the in-laws' place for lobster tails tomorrow
and all you get is this lousy e-mail, which might not even get to you
in time for you to read it before you take off to Kiev but I hope it
did and I've been drinking a lot of Coke Zero recently so sorry if this
mail's a little disjointed but have a happy mother's day or if it's
already past I hope you had a good one.

Love,
A

***

MORE EXAMPLES OF ANDREW'S DUNDERHEADEDNESS

As we're walking back from T's parents' place after the Mother's Day Supper (which was delicious), T says, "Did you wish your sister a Happy Mother's Day?" and I say, "Oh, $&*%."

***

THE DIVA BLOGS

For those who are interested in hearing a different side of some of the tales I tell, Tiina's started her own blog, which can be found here: http://tiinadadiva.blogspot.com/

Note on the May 9 post she made: I'm not going to say anything against coffee--one whiff of the stuff should give anyone everything they need to know about its unending horrors--but I do find it somewhat alarming that T wondered why her coffee was lumpy for three days before determining that it wasn't just an awful drink but that the creamer she'd been mixing in the awful drink wasn't as fluid in nature as one would hope. Not that it comes as a surprise that she couldn't tell the creamer was bad simply by the taste--it is coffee, after all, so it tastes pretty vile to begin with.

A