Monday, June 16, 2008

Monday Afternoon Ramblethon

It occurs to me that if I'd spent the last five hours feeling sorry for myself in a hospital emergency waiting room, rather than lying VERY, VERY STILL in bed feeling sorry for myself, I'd probably have gotten a shot of demerol by now.

Of course, that would require me to somehow get from my bed to the hospital emergency room, and the thought of moving AT ALL right now is positively horrifying. Just getting to the washroom right now is bad enough, the notion of a car ride--dear god, of speed bumps...I'd shudder, if shuddering wouldn't make me scream in intense discomfort.

Of course, in the middle of this an old friend I haven't had a chance to talk to properly for almost a year calls up. I liked it better in the old days, when his unfortunately timed calls would come during an all-night bender or something of a slightly more, uh, extralegal nature.

But my all-night bender days appear to be behind me, and the only extralegal things going on around my and T's house take place on the corner, in our hedge, just outside the front gate, and apparently in our driveway (which is where we've been told the Dial-a-Dopers park while waiting for a call--the garage is situated in such a way that we can't see the driveway pretty much until we're in it.)

If had a dime for every time I saw a kid smoking something from a glass pipe/vial thingie just beyond our hedge...well, I'd have ten cents. But it's not everyday you see a teenager crouched on your corner in the middle of the afternoon, sucking down something that must surely be a (poorly) controlled substance. If I had my way, it's not something I would *ever* see. Once is one time too many, esp. after we discovered someone had been using a crook in one of our trees as a home. Not that I mind, really, but a couple bucks for rent would've gone a long way. We could even have used the money to do desperately needed work on the yard, which would've made life more pleasant for us and our tenant. What a selfish, anonymous bastard he/she was...

And now I've got the hiccups. Take me now, Lord...

A

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